I am aggravated. By the Internet. And yet I am using the Internet to alleviate the anger.

Yey for contradictionssss. :|

I am tired. Of writing about female wrestlers. Of having to expound on matters. Of things.

I froze up while sleeping. I thought I was being strangled. Hm. But I also thought I accomplished astral projection. Hm. But whyyyyyyy would I go to our office if I knew I could do that? I don't really like the office. It has a noisy cow dog (not a red or a green but a bell puppy).

I am very bored today. And annoyed. And Neia is sickly. And I want to go home now. And the window indicates near-darkness, despite the time. And something in my skull is going blrblrblrblr again. I don't like Sprite, but it's sitting on my desk, half-consumed.

It's taking so long. My Mr. Burns posture is going even more concave.

Kahapon, may pinasok yung doktor sa ilong ko. Parang karayom na straw na nakakabit sa tube. Nung nakita ko yung nasa tube, natawa ako tapos naalala ko andun nanay ko kaya sabi ko nalang "Yaaaak." May slurp slurp kasi, at naalala ko pa yung kay Mister Chuck Palahniuk na "shoo-rooook!" sa kwento niya. Kaso hindi ganun sa kin dahil errr iba yung nangyari (pero haha magkalapit?). Pakiramdam ko yung likod ng mata ko tinutusok tapos hinihila palabas sa ilong. Waw paano kaya kung yung eyeballs nasa nostrils?

Binigyan ako ng madaming tissue ulit, tapos prescription para sa antibiotics. Meron din akong nasal spray. Hindi ko alam kung may amoy siya o wala talaga. Di nga makaamoy e. Haha.

Pero [a]llergic [r]hinitis (gaah) daw yun. Nasa sistema ko na siya. Ayos. Di pa rin ako makahinga tapos yung pagkain, lasang mainit.

* * *

Masaya. Lilt and the Verve. Na-miss ko kayo asexually. Hahaha.

* * *

One scarf will catch and anchor in the wheel.
Such yellow sullen smokes
Make their own element. They will not rise,

But trundle round the globe
Choking the aged and the meek,
The weak

Hothouse baby in its crib,
The ghastly orchid
Hanging its hanging garden in the air,

Devilish leopard!
Radiation turned it white
And killed it in an hour.

[Galing sa "Fever 103°" ni Sylvia Plath. Nagkaroon pala siya ng chronic sinusitis.]

Aaaakkggghhh shet ayoko nang mag-thesisssssss

lkasgdhnadslimfjvadsijfcewm9ih23cijkdsfvma;cjlj,adsfuvcwhmklwaewr12rcv32vdmfa!

Pigang-piga na utak ko kanina pang 8 ng umaga ano ba


!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR.

Ayoko na rin humarap kay Lord Bergamask of Antinomy at sa kung ano pa mang computer screen. Masakit sa ulo at sa mata.

Ayoko na. Ayaw.

Ang gulo-gulo mo European Space Agency bwisit kaaaaa ang labo ng Framework Agreement mo bakit ayaw mo bang magpakasal sa EU aaaargghhhhhhh. Kung weaponized lang ako (katulad ng mangyayari sa yo sa ilang taon) papasabugin kita para malaman mo rin kung ano ang pakiramdam ng maging sabog.

ARGHHH ISA PA YANG NEOFUNCTIONALISM NA YAN ANO BA WAG MO KAMING GULUHIN! UMAYOS KA NGA ANG DAMI MONG PINAPATAY. Genocide na ang kasalanan mo bwisit na theory ka.

Tama naa tama naaa patigilin niyo na sila ang sakit sakit na ng ulo ko tumigil na kayo ang dami niyong ginagawang kalokohan ha first-world countries lang kayo gusto ko pa naman kayong puntahan France at Germany pero inaaway niyo kami.

Hindi ako madalas magalit pero nakakagago ka na Europe sinasadya mo pa e.


ARGHHHHHHHHHH


Buti nalang may karamay ako.



Yun lang.

Bow.




Hinde. Lalampasan kita. Bwiset. Magpipiga na nga lang ako kung meron pa. HRNF.

YEY WE'RE DONE WITH THE THESIS PROPOSAL DEFENSE!

Okay, no. This is a thesis rant. You might as well go ahead and read the rest of your Friends' entries because this won't do you any good. If you don't want good, then join my legion of vengeful muffins! I applaud you. But what is 'good' anyway? Hm.

We passed our Thesis Proposal defense. 16% out of 20%. Okay. Whoo.

The reader and our mentor advised us to refocus our problem, which would practically change the research. It's not just rewriting the whole thing, the paper would have to mutate. Right. Accepted. We can do that. Our original study was on the problems that the European Space Agency and the European Union encountered in creating a formal relationship, since they didn't have one. We were told that we should instead explore the hindrances to the European Common Space Policy and why it hasn't been done yet. Okay. I started to look for sources this afternoon, and what do you know! There already is a Common Space Policy for Europe! Wonderful. That means we have no thesis. We have nothing more to research. Really. And we have to revise the paper by Wednesday. I e-mailed our mentor and am waiting for his reply. I guess we should start hunting down other problems regarding the EU and ESA. If we don't find any, maybe I shall send hexes upon their headquarters oh lordy. They must have more problems! Human beings do not run out of problems while they are alive the European Space Agency is run by humans so we must find challenges to their unity! Gaaaaah.

Today I saw a split-second rectangle of color in a strand of my hair.

I'm at that point where I don't know what I need anymore. This first day of the term was as easy as breathing. But I have a bad cold.

Pros:
+ French was fine, our prof seems okay.
+ I got home on the night bus fine and unscathed.
- The Legendary Dr. Robles of the IS Dept. isn't our prof
+ MLF
+ I finished the book I now want to marry: Ray Bradbury's "Something Wicked This Way Comes."
+ . . .

Cons:
+ I'm struggling with French when I haven't even mastered my English and Filipino yet. Mon Dieu!
+ The story I'm submitting for LitAw worries me.
+ I'm bent and spent.
+ Every Monday for this term I'll have to face You're-Not-Gonna-Know-Who-But-You-Do at 9:20 am.
+ Reading Journal?
+ This stupid keyboard of ours isn't working. I'm using the On-Screen Keyboard. (wow that was random)
+ I finished the book I now want to marry: Ray Bradbury's "Something Wicked This Way Comes." It was the only escape from reality I had.
+ So. Much. Readings that don't really interest me.
+ Cold. *sniff*
+ I'm wasting time here.
+ There's a tomorrow.


FIGHT. and FINISH.
Yeah, most people are worse off than me. I just really need to force myself to believe that.

"It's like you said! The children try to end the hunger for sweetness in their...rumbling, undead...belliieeees!" -Invader Zim, Halloween Spectacular of Spooky Doom

* * *

Finish. Please. FINISH.

I can't believe I'm coming back to you. I thought we were over but there's still...



revision.



(O_O)



But I can't see again. Can I?


This is what procrastinating does. It's what keeps me up at dawn. It's even better than coffee. And then there's Livejournal for when you're stuck.

Stuff that need to be concretized, that are pushed back into the brain are forced out. Then they come out like Flubber through the ears.

Would you care for some Brain Juice, freshly squeezed?


* * *


*wipes face*
You'll see in Book Seven...on July 7, 2007. :D
All in good time, Harry.


* * *

Damnit. I'm going back to sleep. To think.

Pen, stay by me.
Paper, stay by the pen.

Brain, work.



If you don't come to me in a dream then I'll have to make you up so you'll exist and we can live. Not happily. Not ever after. But live.

So.

Teka. Gusto ko mag-Filipino.


May virus ang PC namin sa bahay kaya ayun, patay.
Patay ako dahil Nov. 6 na nga ang deadline.
Patay yung PC dahil malapit ko nang saksakan ng kutsilyo.
Patay ang binisita namin kahapon kaya hindi ako nakapag-aral.

Bwiset talaga.


May midterms pa ko, tapos na nga midterms week.


Mukha atang walang pumasa sa IPOLECO exam namin, kahit babaan pa ni Sir ng ten points ang passing grade.



Yung short story ko? Ha? Anong short story?



Wala kaming French ngayon. At least next week pa midterms dun at kaya ko pang mag-aral ng mga linya ko. Wo0t.


Binilhan ako ng nanay ko ng USB Flash Drive (128 MB). Dahil nga walang PC sa bahay, kung saan-saan nalang ako nakiki-kompyuter.


Halloween? Walang sense. May pasok pero tinamad magturo ang mga prof.


Oras. Oras. Oras. Hindi na nga ako matutulog. Pwede ba dito nalang ako sa library mabuhay? Walang resources sa bahay e.




Wala na din yung utak ko. Sumama sa kabaong.



* * *

KAILANGAN KO NG TULA para sa Poetry Recital. Suggestions naman po ng foreign poets. PLEASE.